A or B...

I am pissed off and frustrated with more then a few things (people) right now.

I am sitting here trying to debate whether it's worth hashing out and talking about it...or, just saying fuck it and admit that life sucks sometimes.

I chose option B.

Some Of The Boys...

I don't know why I like this picture. It's at a bad angle. You can't see Benny's face. I have no reason to like this.

But I do.

Life Available In 25 Cent Increments...

Lack of funds is causing Kiki and myself to sell off our personal belongings, yard sale style.

So pieces of my life are available in 25 cent increments.

If there is anything of mine you want, speak up fast.

I Am That Kind Of Dork...

Nsync's 'Bye Bye Bye' is on the radio.

Kiki and I both got very excited.

That's How Drunk...

Thursday night, post softball.

The boys were all sitting at the bar mystified by "The World Series of DARTS"! Fucking darts! I was so entertained by this that I posed the question to Josh.

"How drunk/stoned do you have to be to find darts interesting?" (cuz that's how some of those boys are).

Well, the answer is...4 Smirnoff on the rocks for Juicy to find it completely captivating.

How much did those 4 drinks cost me? $5! God, I love the NWL!

Nap Time...

Tonight, I am babysitting Ray-ray's kids while her and her husband go see Smashmouth.

I haven't babysat in years. I am actually looking forward to it.

Her kids go to bed by like 8. I am soooo taking advantage and catching up on my sleep that I lost the last two nights.

Funny Story...

I was asked on Wednesday night by one of the softball boys if I was coming to the game the following night.

Before I had a chance to answer, one of the other guys replied.

"Shut up, she's our only fan that isn't Josh's mom or doesn't want to do Josh. Don't scare her away."

I was entertained.

Weird...

I have referred to myself as a pretty girl several times this week and meant it.

That's never happened before.

We Are Experiencing Technical Stuff...

Cellphone being sent in for repair today.

I love my phone! I am going to miss it.

But fear not, I have been sent a loaner phone. *grumbles* damn Nokia. I am not exactly sure how the transistion process is going to work, but if you can't get ahold of me....leave a message. I'll find ya!

*smooches*

Rock The Fuck On...

Dead Like Me is on Sci-Fi channel as reruns!

Leave The Pieces...

A boy fucked with my head today. My heart too. I seldom let stuff of this nature get me down...because well, look at me. I am freaking adorable.


Ok, not really. But why worry about something you can't control.

Well, this boy raked me over the coals this morning. By the time I was at work, I was questioning everything about myself.

Josh pointed out, when I had lunch at his other place of employment (not the bar), that perhaps I shouldn't be letting anyone make me feel that bad.

And then he and Will offered to kick his ass. This skinny assed white boys made me smile and all is right in Juiceland tonight. (If I was a theme park, I imagine that would be the name)

But I can't help but think of "Leave the Pieces" by The Wreckers (Michelle Branch's pet project).

"You're gonna break my heart anyway, so leave the pieces when you go..."

Even if you don't like country sounding stuff...it's quite good and deserves a listen.

Bored...

You May Be a Bit Dependent...

You're more than a little preoccupied with being abandoned. You need a lot of support in your life, at all times. It's difficult for you to survive on your own... And you don't reallly think you ever could.

What Personality Disorder Are You?

You Are 36% Lady

You tend to make up your rules of etiquette, throwing all conventions aside. And while you try to be a lady (sometimes), your behavior is often quite shocking.

Are You A Lady?

Slow and Steady

Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It'd really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment. They expect you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then usually decide against it.

How Do People See You?

You're Totally Sarcastic

You sarcastic? Never! You're as sweet as a baby bunny. Seriously, though, you have a sharp tongue - and you aren't afraid to use it. And if people are too wimpy to deal with your attitutde, then too bad. So sad.

How Sarcastic Are You?

Caffe Vanilla Frappuccino

Smooth and sweet, you fit in to almost any crowd. No one would suspect you of being a coffee tweaker!

What Flavor Frappuccino Are You?

Orange County

You're rich, pretty, and living a charmed life. (Or you seriously wish you were.) From Disneyland to Laguna Beach, you're all about living the California dream life. Just make sure to marry rich - so you don't have to work for it!

Where Does Your Inner Californian Belong?

You Are A Martini

You are the kind of drinker who appreciates a nice hard drink. And for you, only quality alcohol. You don't waste your time on the cheap stuff. Obviously, you're usually found with a martini in your hand. But sometimes you mix it up with a gin and tonic. And you'd never, ever consider one of those flavored martinis. They're hardly a drink!

What Alcoholic Drink Are You?

You Aren't Scary, You're Scared

Probably even scared to see how this quiz came out!

How Scary Are You?

You Are a Learning Cook

You've got the makings of an excellent cook, and the desire to be one. But right now, you're just lacking the experience. You couldn't be a top chef yet, but you could be an apprentice.

Are You A Good Cook?

This And That...

I finally have a day off! I have been working alot of weekends (all of them) without getting my day off because we have been kinda short handed. Everybody else gets their days off, except for me.

Today is my turn.

I was suppose to get up and go to the Y with Ray-ray. Yea, no. I needed a nap. I have been sick and I wanted to sleep. So that's what I did.

Melbell and I just drug our asses out of bed now, she's caught my cold I think. I feel bad. Summer colds are the worst and this one sucks.

I need to go to bitch out my cellphone provider today. I have a flip phone. It is set so that when you open the display it answers the incoming call. Well, the sensor is on the fritz and tends to hang up most of my calls right now. The screen will flash on and then decide it's not really feeling like acknowledging that I have opened the phone.

Piece o shit is what it is.

I need to do laundry as well. I normally do that on Sunday, but as I didn't care about anything other then sleeping off my Saturday night, this Sunday, it seemed to be perfect that I had today off.

I am going to lunch with Joshie and one of his friends. I have eaten more chinese then ever since I started hanging out with Josh.

I should probably clear up some Josh things too. Josh is one of my closest friends right now. Guys are just soo much easier to hang out with sometimes. As wonderful as he is, I don't think Josh and I would be a good relationship fit. When I say things like "date night", I don't really mean date night. We are just good friends. I would NEVER do anything that come between Kiki and Josh either. I think they are going to make a cute couple, if it comes to that.

Poor Melbelle, is fast asleep on the couch. Even when she's not feeling well, she's beautiful. I just wish she was less troubled.

Nothing To Say...

I’m tugging at my hair
I’m pulling at my clothes
I’m trying to keep my cool
I know it shows
I’m staring at my feet
My cheeks are turning red
I’m searching for the words inside my head

(Cause) I’m feeling nervous
Trying to be so perfect
Cause I know you’re worth it
You’re worth it
Yeah

If I could say what I want to say
I'd say I wanna blow you... away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down
On one knee
Marry me today
Guess, I’m wishing my life away
With these things I’ll never say

It don’t do me any good
It’s just a waste of time
What use is it to you
What’s on my mind
If it ain’t coming out
We’re not going anywhere
So why can’t I just tell you that I care

What’s wrong with my tongue
These words keep slipping away
I stutter, I stumble
Like I’ve got nothing to say

Guess I’m wishing my life away with these things I’ll never say
If I could say what I want to say
I'd say I wanna blow you...away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down
On one knee
Marry me today
Yes, I’m wishing my life away
With these things I’ll never say
These things I’ll never say

Starry Eyed Surprise...

I woke up in the middle of the night to get a drink and got a bloody nose. This in itself is not foreign to me. Happens all the time.

Well, I have gotten 4 more since then. This last one is proving really hard to stop. I have been bleeding steadily since 6. It's after 7 now. I just can't get it to clot. I have tried ice pack, tipping my head, the whole 9 yards.

It started in the shower thankfully, because I sneezed and my nose exploded. I am sore. And it wouldn't be so bad except, it's bleeding so hard that I have actually stopped noticing the metallic taste of blood in my mouth. I keep having to stop to hack blood because, apparently it can't seem to get out of my nose fast enough.

I know that if it doesn't stop soon, I am going to have to go to the walk-in. Yay. Just what I wanted to do this morning.

An Ode To My Apartment...

I am going to randomly post things that annoy me about my apartment.

Today's issue. Water.

You can't drink the water here. You can't really cook with the water here. It's REALLY BAD well water. It turns my sinks, tubs, toliet a lovely shade of rust. It's a constant job making sure that this stuff clean. It stinks most days too.

Tonight I ran a bucket of water, to mop the floors. The water in the bucket was brown before the mop even hit the bucket.

It's gross.

Destination Unknown...

Last night did not go as planned.

Josh and I did make it out to dinner. With Melanie. It was revealed at dinner that we had some stuff to discuss, but he didn't want to talk about it with me until he had a few drinks in him. I am not going to lie. It didn't sound good. I got nervous. We are all sitting there and Melanie let it out that she didn't have alot of cash and needed help covering dinner. Nice.

We didn't make the movie, because dinner at one of the best establishments in town took FOREVER! I really wanted to go see Clerks last night. Oh well. Another day, I imagine.

Well, since we didn't get to the movie, we made plans to meet in a little bit at our favorite bar and see where the night takes us.

Melanie wanted to quick stop at a friend's house party, which was ok by me. Until we got there and the reason we were actually there became clear. Her ex was there. After leaving the party and going to meet with Josh, I knew way ahead of time, that she was going to ditch me. We had driven together and I had no car, but I knew she was going to ditch me.

Right on cue, after her 1st drink, she announced she was leaving. Josh sensing my instant annoyance, drove me back home to get my car.

I love Mel to death, but she is a dramatic little girl. She puts herself in stupid places because she is scared of being single. I was almost relieved that she left, I wasn't going to have to hash over all night, what him looking at her might have meant, etc. I didn't have to babysit. So that was alright. I was free to enjoy myself.

Josh and I headed to another one of our favorite drinking establishments and spend the rest of the evening there. I spent the majority of my time chatting with my favorite Young politican. The man is a bastard, he is ruthless, he is smooth, and cunning. And he is a hell of a lot of fun. Josh and I just kept tabs on each other and entertained ourselves by texting some what catty comments back and forth across the bar.

Well, when the aspiring president was in the bathroom, I heard a voice behind me ask if we could talk. I knew the voice to be familiar but I wasn't expecting the person who was standing there.

Kiki's ex-boyfriend.

So here I was, being pulled aside in a busy bar, by a friend's ex and his friends. Nothing like being put on the spot. Thankfully, the boy was drunk and I didn't have to deal with him a long time. He asked a lot of questions that I could not answer and not because I didn't know the answer. I didn't want to meddle. He asked who Josh was. I was vague and the only answer I gave him was, "Josh is a good friend of mine." This seemed ok. He continued pouring his heart out to me and I sincerely felt bad for the guy. He has feelings for Kiki. It's gotta hurt going through what he is. But since I don't date, I wouldn't know.

Then Mel showed up. He cornered Mel and pulled her aside, leaving me with one of his friends. A very drunk friend. Who took the last $7 I had sitting on the table and then asked if he could buy me a drink. Smooth. Josh sensing I was in some distress came over at the perfect time and wrapped himself around me. Mel and the ex returned and damn near insisted that I head to the bar where ever one ends up to drink and oogle the opposite sex. I promised I would try to make it, knowing that I wasn't hanging out with them, under free will.

Well, the night went on and Josh's wingman appeared and the drinks started to flow pretty fast. I didn't actually pay for them anymore, which is spectacular. Knowing the bartenders in this town, has gotten me far.

Next thing, I knew. I was in the passenger seat of my car, and we were headed back to my house. When I say we, I mean, Wingman, Tomtom, Josh and some guy I knew...but didn't know. It was fun none the less. The night started to get a little fuzzy at this point. I am not even really sure how we voted to come to my place. Well, it probably has to do with the fact that Josh hates his house (that he is moving out of today) and my place is cleaner. Kiki showed up at this point, and we all sat around...doing our thing.

For whatever reason, Josh and I were outside and he decided to check his blood sugar (type 1 diabetic). It was dangerously low. He technically should not have been standing even really. After debating the situation rather quickly, it was voted that we were the most aware of our state of beings that we would have to be the ones who took him to get some sugar. So we hopped in the car, no explanations, just went. We felt bad but it was kind of an emergency. It wasn't until after we got to the gas station and was pumping Josh full of orange juice that we noticed that neither of us had any shoes on. Thankfully, we knew the attendant and he didn't seem to care either way.

After the small emergancy had been resolved our morning continued. At about 6, people started to get alittle tired. Wingman and Tomtom headed out in search of the elusive egg mcmuffin and Josh began to get a little concerned about working in a few hours. We sent him in the bedroom to nap, while Kiki and caught each other up on our nights.

Once Josh was snoozing away, Kiki departed and I curled up next to Josh. I set my alarm for him but neither of us really slept. We just kinda of drifted in and out of states of awareness. Being a guy is easy as hell as far as getting ready for work. He was able to wait to leave for work until 9 minutes before his shift started. It was kinda funny. Quick peck on the cheek and he was gone, but not before he whispered that he owed me a talk. I was shocked he remembered and owned up to it.

So yea, that's not exactly the dinner and a movie I had planned.

Today, I am helping Josh move. It's not exactly what I want to be doing. You see, part of 'the talk' that Josh and I are going to have is probably going to cover him moving. And not moving in with me as discussed. I know he feels bad about kinda leaving me hanging, so I know that's what he wants to talk about. Well, that and we need to talk about a trip we had planned to take together that I am pretty sure he is bitching out on. When I called him on it, he said he was 80% sure that he was going but we would talk about it later.

So now that I don't know how to end this MONSTER blog, I am going to get in the shower.

Kisses!

Movie Mumblings...

Wow, I haven't done this in awhile.

Dark Water - Wow. Major blowage. I disliked this very much so.

Undiscovered - I didn't completely hate this. It's movie about a bunch of unknowns trying to break out and find love. Only 'name' in the movie that was anything was Ashlee Simpson. So a bunch of unknowns. They played the roles well, if wasn't a great movie...but good for what it was.

Imagine Me and You - Most unexpected romantic comedy ever. Girl meets boy. Boy proposes. Girl says yes. Girl locks eyes with girl while walking down the aisle?! Girl meets girl. Boy finds out, leaves girl. Girl gets girl? Strange. But entertaining.

Into The Blue - Not half bad for a Jessica Alba movie. Am I the only person who doesn't find her attractive?

Pirates Of The Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest - LONG! It's almost 3 hours. When you figure that they turned a 10 minute amusement park ride into 3 full length films that rock, credit is due somewhere.

Tonight, I go see Clerks 2 with Josh. We are going to try that date night thing again.

Stupid Town...

So Josh and I didn't get our 'date' night last night.

Wingman happens to be the other evening bartender. Well, apparently he just thought, "Maybe I won't go to work today. Being the boss's son, Josh is automatically recruited to fill in these gaps. he was not pleased.

Less pleased was myself. I had a crap day at work, and to be honest was really looking forward to being spoiled a little. How selfish is that? And I don't care, sometimes we all need to be a little selfish.

Now, how is this all the town's fault you might ask? This town almost encourages the residents near my age to drink themselves into oblivion. Well, everytime Wingman does this, he forgets all his stuff. Cellphone, wallet, everything. If you find his stuff just laying about and him not around, yea...you probably won't see him for a few days.

So town's fault date night got cancelled. And now next Friday night I have to babysit for a friend. POO!

Quote Of The Night...

"She's so beautiful, she makes me wish I was single."

You can imagine, that they weren't talking about me. Because they weren't.

Ain't No Cure For The Summertime Blues...

Been bummed out the last few days. Nothing major, but bummage ensued. Coming down with a summer cold and that sucks. That's got me feeling a little worn out.

Finances are kinda tight. Lost my credit card the other night, but I am sure it's at Josh's. The problem is neither of us have been over there to look for it.

Had a hard time enjoying Thursday night softball last night, my heart wasn't in it. I was there, but you could tell I was a million miles away. It bothered Josh. 5 minutes after I left the bar (hug and kiss-less, which I think really bothered him), he was on the phone with me. I couldn't tell him what's wrong, because I don't know. Well, he made me promise that we'd go on a date tonight. It's funny because we had just made Saturday lunch plans a little before that. And actually, a 'date' sounds really good right now.

I better get ready for work. I will finish this thought tonight.

Gooey Goodness...

OMG!! I had the best time ever at the Goo concert on Monday. This was my 6th show and I can tell you, by far the best. I was also damn close to the front. Kiki, Will, Renee and I worked our way to about the 3rd row. It was AMAZING!!! We got back to town and met some people at a tiny resort bar and had a few drinks. Then, my tiny apartment became host to a few friends.

Long story short, Kiki and I went to work on about 45 minutes of sleep. But there was snuggling!

*please appreciate the time it takes to load pictures while using dial-up connections...and if I am really bored...perhaps I will load the video we took into Youtube tonight*


Ok, I have a couple of really Goo-d ones, but seeing as how dial-up keeps kicking me off, it'll have to wait.

*Notice the time stamp. I am hitting publish at 9.10pm. 56k sucks.*

Crisis Line Active...

It's a full on girl crisis night.

Mel showed up, crying. Her boyfriend dumped her.

A few calls later Rebecca, Mel, Josh and I were huddled around a table with drinks in our hands and a "Sorry" board in front of us.

Josh is an honorary girl, in case you were wondering. He even joins us when we "have to pee". Which incidently, when girls say that they have to pee...they seldom mean pee. It's conference time. Josh joins us frequently.

Mel is going to be staying here for a few days. Which is strange, because she lives at home, and not with the boyfriend. She just doesn't want to have to tell her mom that she messed things up with a med student. I scolded her for this.

Ah, girl world. We are now going to watch Mean Girls.

It's Something To Me...

I got on the scale today and saw a number that made me cry.

Tears of joy.

This morning, I hit my first of many goals on weight. I feel validated. Jubilant even.

I want to celebrate with a big blizzard. Instead, this bottle of water looks good.

Tomorrow...

What Goo Goo Dolls song\video are you?

You are HERE IS GONE. You are sad and wishful. You feel stuck in one spot. You don't know where to go. You have so much inside you. You want to get out.
Take this quiz!








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I am going to see the Goo Goo Dolls tomorrow. I am so freaking pumped!

Send Me A Dream...

I just woke up from a 6 hour nap.

I fell asleep watching the Cubs game.

My 'nap' was longer then I sleep at night.

"Goddamn Right It's A Beautiful Day..."

Ferris Bueller is on!

But Don't Get Me Wrong...

I LOVE SUMMER!! I don't care if it's this hot year round.

I NEVER WANT TO FEEL COLD AGAIN!

Hot In...

Oh my! It's warm. It's not even 1 yet, and it's 95 out.

That's hot.

I have not been feeling well since Friday morning. I think it's the combo of lack of food (I have groceries, I just don't want them), heat and lack of sleep.

Last night, I fell asleep at 5 and slept until 8.30. Passed back out before the news came on. Woke up at like 2 and then was asleep again by 4.

I slept alot. I might have just been super tired, but when I am sick, I sleep alot too, and heat makes you sleepy too.

I feel slightly better today, but not 100%.

Who Died And Made You Fucking King Of The Zombies?...

You've seen "Shaun of the Dead", right? For your own safety this answer had better be yes. And if it's no, rent it right now, watch it. And THEN read the post. That movie is way more important, then anything I could write here in this page.

ANYWAY, so you may have read me mention the NWL (Yesterday, I think is actually the first time I mentioned it, but if you managed to read that giant post...it was there). The NWL is my Winchester. I have been spending a large amount of time there. I would bet that in case of a zombie outbreak, that's where I'd go.

I am sure it has alot to do with Bartender Josh. His dad owns the place, so by default, Josh is the primary bartender. You may also from time to time hear me talk about Wingman (also yesterday), he is the second night bartender. Between the 2 of them, they actually attract a very young crowd. Which is very surprising. It's always kind of viewed by the community as an 'old man' bar. It's funny because I promise you, if I spend more then an hour there on any given night, every person I know between the ages of 20-30 will wander through that door. Some people come to see their friends. Others come for the adorable bartenders. I personally don't mind either.

Some find their way there for the drinks. It is a bar, after all. And the true nature of the beast, brings you there for the beer. I almost always order the same thing when I am there. I get myself a coconut flavored Diet Coke. There's a story behind that as well. Kiki and I went there for dinner one night (and that's the final reason people go there, but I am getting there) and Josh asked me what I wanted to drink. I said diet soda. He asked what flavor. What he should have asked was Pepsi or Coke. I replied with coconut-y. So now, I cannot order a Malibu Diet. The proper way to order it is a coconut-y flavored Diet Coke. Well, one of those delish numbers will cost you $1.90, any day of the week. The same will go for Kiki's Tanguray and tonics. Can't beat that if you are looking to get your drink on.

Final and most important reason to go there, is that there is a sign on the wall behind the bar boasting that they serve the finest sandwich in town. It's true, the food there is nothing short of amazing!!! Well, in the summer time they feature this wonderful seafood salad. People wait patiently every year for that sign to come out. It's the best thing on earth. Well, those of you reading along at home, may have noticed that many of my weekend evenings don't end until the sun comes up. It's the damn seafood salad. Josh will lead us back into the bar, we will sit way in the back in the dark and eat our salad, talking about the night's events. Sometimes it gets delayed by drunken people needing rides home, but it ends the same. There is something that happens after the clock strikes 2 a.m., that makes this tasty dish simply irresistible. It becomes like crack. It taste far better in the dark, in the wee small hours of the morning. It's just assumed that if I am out at bar close, I am expecting seafood salad. Josh knows this and I think sometimes looks forward to it. It's our thing. As a test once, I took a side order home with me. It has no magical powers in the light of day. It's all about that 3 a.m. thing.

So, my Winchester is the NWL. My co-workers often make comments about it being my new home. I reply with, "I will be at the 3rd stool from the left. Have my mail forwarded."

Lucky Girl...

That's me.

I wish I could elaborate on that. I am just too pleased with life right now to be bothered with it though.

No Good...

It's 2:33 and I am wasted.

Mel is passed out in bed and Josh is about out on the couch.

Gather Around Kiddies...

It's Story Time!

So back in October, Xan and I were just kinda relaxing at his apartment and it was mentioned that his roommate at the time, might be a good match up with the fair and lovely Kiki. The roommate in question, happened to be Bartender Josh. Upon further discussion, we did conclude that they would make a good match and passed on the information. Kiki managed to casually observe him one day during her workout at the local health club, and judged him instantly based on his sock attire. (what is that about?)

Flash forward several months and Kiki and our intrepid hero, cross paths again. Kiki is sitting in a local tavern and suddenly decides that Josh is in fact, quite attractive. She sends me a text letting me know that I may have been on to something way back when. When I passed the information on to Josh and he approached Kiki. Light flirting ensued.

Flash forward months later (again). Josh and I have started to get a little closer, hanging out more and more everyday. Kiki during this time relucantly acquires a boyfriend. Nice enough guy, but not someone she really sees herself with in the long run. But following the advice of a friend, gives the guy a chance. Meanwhile, she also begins attending Thursday night softball games that I have been attending in support of Josh's 2 teams. The new boyfriend generally stays home to allow her to enjoy a night out with her friends. Following the games, it's customary for us all to retire to the sponsoring bar for drinks and food. Well, the more drinks consumed, the more bold Josh becomes. As a few weeks go on, as the limits of appropriate are being pushed and flowers are being sent, it's clear to Kiki that she must make a decision.

So post game one night, Kiki stands outside the bar that Josh is sitting in and makes the call. With me standing next to her, and her boyfriend on speakerphone, she ended their short relationship. Upon hearing the news, Josh, who had a crap day, bought the bar a round.

Advice came flooding at Josh at an incredible rate. It all summed up to this, "Take it slow, if you don't want to fuck this up." So despite his very nature, he took a step back. Casual flirting continues but nothing much happens. The boyfriend hasn't completely faded into the background. He continues to call Kiki to try and make plans with her. She continues to push him aside.

People begin to wonder if the boyfriend knows that Josh may have started a little something with Kiki. No one understand how he can't because it seems everyone knows.

Now, we are almost current.

The 4th of July, Josh spends up in Three Lakes with Kiki and I to see the fireworks. Josh consumes a fair share of drinks and is getting a little nervous. He knows he wants something to happen, but isn't sure how to make it happen. Well, they ended up on a blanket together watching the fireworks. It was innocent and cute. We headed back to town and grabbed some Taco Bell with the intention of finishing the cooler of alcohol we took to the park. Well, we all kinda passed out in front of the TV. It didn't take much prompting to get Kiki to crawl into the bedroom and go back to sleep. Josh on the other hand took some work. She had fallen asleep curled up in his lap and still didn't think it was ok to cuddle in bed with her. After much discussion (light arguing) between he and I, he finally climbed into bed next to her.

Thursday then, it became clear that I had forgotten to pass on the information that Kiki was going on vacation Saturday morning. So instead of going to the house party that we were all to attend, we headed to a resort bar. By the time, Kiki and I arrived, Josh had appeared to be in some distress. Apparently, Kiki had mentioned to Josh's wingman that she thought he was displaying pussy-like behavior but not making a move. Being the good wingman he is, he pulled Josh aside and passed this on.

Right on schedule, Josh had a freakout. She spent a good 30 minutes or so outside the bar, pacing and cursing the back of Kiki's head. When he came back inside, he wanted to talk to me, but since I was seated at the bar next to Kiki, he kept his distance. Unaware that this had already been discussed, Kiki mentioned to me that she was not happy with how slow things were moving.

At this point, despite that I love Kiki to no end, I felt bad for Josh. I bitched her out a bit. How was he supposed to know? After I chewed her out a bit, I told Josh that maybe after she returned from vacation, he might think about making something happen.

Oh no, not Josh. Josh is a man of action. That was the night.

As Kiki was head back from the bathroom, Josh executed what could have been a very smooth move. As she walked passed him, he grabbed her and whisked her away by the door. It would have been beautiful except for that chair that he backed right over. In a bar full of his friends, he tripped over a chair trying to impress a girl. Nothing pleased us more.

The night went on and additional plans were made for following bar close. Tentative plans were made for Josh to steal a few minutes of her time Friday night prior to her leaving for IL on vacation. She was unreachable. She didn't answer her phone and had no reply when any of her friends tried to reach her.

I felt bad when everyone asked me where she was, I was withholding information. I knew that she had plans with her former boyfriend. See, they had plans to camp together at Hodag prior to the break-up. Feeling bad about leaving him with no plans, Kiki agreed to share her campsite with him. So they had to get together to co-ordinate on somethings. I felt bad withholding information from Josh, because he's my friend, but I was growing tired of being in the middle. So, I shut my piehole.

Saturday night was a friend's birthday. Josh and I went out to help him celebrate his 21st. We were drug to the local karaoke bar, that we both happen to dislike. We were planning on staying there until Miss Mel sang her song and we were outta there. Well, once Kiki's ex walked in, Josh couldn't take it. He was out like a fat kid at dodgeball. Told me where to meet him and he was gone.

Her ex stayed surprisingly close to me. It kinda made me wonder what was going on. I left shortly after Josh and met up with him at our favorite meat market. We were there getting our drink and dance on, and low and behold. There's the ex. Standing close enough to hear everything we were saying. It made us uncomfortable at first, but it's a busy bar, and we were standing right by the bar...so it could have been a coincidence.

Well, it wasn't. After being asked to leave at bar close, we were making our way into the street for our post bar snack and chit chat, when the ex asked me to fetch Josh for him. It appeared that there was going to be a throw down. I sent Josh's wing man in the general direction and someone else followed just to keep an eye on things. Turns out, of all the people they knew in that bar, they asked Josh for a ride home.

Well, I was pissed. This shithead was screwing with my post-bar seafood salad (more to follow on that). Well, I joined the stream of people heading to Josh's apartment, because I clearly wasn't getting salad. The drunken wingman and I kind of rambled on down the street taking our time. Well, no sooner then we got to Josh's and I had cracked a beer and Josh called. He and seafood salad were waiting for me. So, I got my shoes back on, grabbed my drink and headed on down the street.

Along the way, the too drunk to drive ex-boyfriend pulled up along side me and asked if I needed a ride. Confusingly, I declined. By the time I got to the NWL (more to follow on that too), I was really confused. But my seafood salad and drink were waiting at our normal table. Josh was a little confused as well, but what just happened to me. But we tried not to think much of it.

Miss Mel called Sunday morning, and had heard something that was strictly hearsay that she felt she needed to repeat to me about the ex boyfriend, not being an ex. This pissed me off beyond any words. And it had no right to. It's none of my business and it's not happening to me. I was pissed the same. I can't figure out if I was more upset that one of the people closest to me was keeping something from me or if I was upset over the idea of Josh getting fucked with. But at any rate, I was pissed and I was blaming it on Kiki.

I hadn't meant to discuss it but Josh could tell the minute he saw me, he knew that something was bugging me. After several hours of bugging me, he got me to talk about it. I felt bad instantly, but he kept saying that no matter what he was a friend first. I knew it was eating him up inside. He just kept reminding me that it was gossip. I got all pissed off over gossip.

Anyway, I think you are up to speed. I probably shouldn't have posted so much or made it so long. I don't know if the Keeks will be pissed off at me or not...but that's what's going on. She's confused as all hell. Both boys are nice, which is a pleasant change for her. I have not gotten the chance to know the (ex)boyfriend all the much, but I don't have anything against him. I like him, seems sweet enough. But I also get the clingy vibe from him. I can so I know Kiki enough to know that clingy = bad. I am trying not to be biased in the whole situation, but Josh is my friend. I do love Josh. I have to wonder though, if she ends up going another route, will I ever be able to hang out with two of my good friends at the same time again?

And that's what it boils down to, what's comfortable for me. Now how's that for selfish?

Well, Hello Tyler...

Tyler Joshua Prentice came into the world at 4.36p yesterday. He is 19 in long and exactly 6 pounds.

He was so excited to meet his parents that he joined us exactly one month early.

Both Alissa and the little guy are doing well.

Better Then Anything C.W. Lewis Ever Wrote...

Stayed tuned tonight/tomorrow for "The Chronicles of Kiki".

Baby News...

So. The didn't wait to induce until Monday.

Alissa was induced tonight at 6.30 pm. They think that by tomorrow afternoon the baby will be here.

I am excited!!

Bits And Bytes...

This week is my 5 year anniversary with the bank. I thought it best to celebrate by being 2 HOURS late for work this morning. I have never been late in my entire career with the bank.

The irony is, I don't sleep that long on my days off. I personally like to call it, "pulling a Kiki." When I got to work, I died a little inside when I saw that not only was my supervisor, and branch manager here, but our newly appointed CEO were all here waiting.

I bit the bullet and asked to speak with all 3 of them at once. This is were the story turns my way. Instead of getting written up, I was told how concerned they were for me. I was also told that they understand that from time to time, things like that will happen. And they are just happy that I am ok.

OK, so I missed a beheading so far, but I wouldn't be surprised if it comes on Monday.

Alissa is still in the hospital. The doctors cannot seem to get her blood pressure down. When I called to check on her yesterday she said that the doctors are not letting her leave the hospital without giving birth. They are going to begin inducing her on Monday morning. If everything goes well, she will be a mommy by Wednesday.

Miss Mel wants me to go out tonight with her and her cousin. Her just released from prison cousin. Uh, I don't know about that.

Bartender Josh and I were going to go Mini-golfing today, but the rain on the windows does cast a shadow of doubt over that. We are in dire need of the rain, but I'd rather mini-golf. Maybe, we can go bowling instead. However, if it remains a light drizzle, we will probably go anyway. What's a little water. We could always go see Pirates. Mmmm. Johnny Depp.

There's also talk of us going to Wausau tomorrow. Me to see Alissa and him to see his former sister-in-law.

Kiki is on vacation and I miss her already. But I imagine I can fill the void with, cleaning her apartment, picking up her mail, doing her dishes...etc.

I should really get back to work.

Then The Morning Comes...

So if any of you have been following along at home, it seems I have been going to incredible lenghts to not be at home. I don't think I am really digging living alone. It's been almost 2 months.

I was so excited to get my own place and prove to everyone, that I am in fact a grown up and could live on my own.

Well, I did it and can do it. Wish I liked it.

I do love my alone time. But I am also comforted by knowing that if I don't want to be alone, I don't have to be. I am considering going back into a roommate situation, but I don't know many details yet.

In other news, I feel trapped by my own insecurities. I have to wonder if I am always going to be that girl. You know, that one. "Oh, that's Nina's friend. Oh, she's here with Josh. There's that girl that Mel hangs out with. Isn't she friends with..." I feel like that girl lately. And I kind of feel disrespected by that. I know I am new to most of the crowd that I am hanging out with, but it still bothers me.

But I just have to remind myself, how lucky I am. I am surrounded everyday by amazing people that remind me how much love there really is around me.

"It's alright, I'll be fine, don't worry about this heart of mine..." those are lyrics that just came out of my tv. I should keep that in mind.

Scared Friend...

Alissa was admitted to the hopsital last night for blood pressure issues. She is 8 months pregnant.

I am a little concerned.

She will more then likely get to come home today, but I am still nervous.

*sigh*

...so sick of being lonely...

'All I Think About Is You'...

*name that song and there's the post title*

I am seriously debating posting a Kiki update for her.

What do you think?

*Yawn*

I am tired as hell today.

And my shoulders still ache.

Thanks For The Warning...

My supervisor pulled me aside today to warm me that I have a very hard couple of weeks coming up. Kiki and Laurie are on vacation. Her words were "it's you and me against them". OY!

One of the busiest weeks of the year and I am without the other 2 fastest moving people in the office.

Then, I work 6 days in a row the next week, and one of them is in a branch office too.

I guess I appreciate the heads up, but now I am filled with a sense of dread.

What The Hell Hurts So Much...

Why do my shoulders feel like they are on fire?

Who wants to rub them?

I KNEW IT...

Xan used to say that I had the best bed he had ever slept in. I think it's pretty comfortable myself, but I am biased.

Kiki came to work today and confirmed to the entire office that, I do in fact, have the most comfortable bed ever.

It makes me grin a little.

A Holiday Weekend In Pictures...

Kiki and I organized a float for the local parade. Here's are our little ducks.

Despite all the drama, it worked out nicely.

After the parade, Kiki, Bartender Josh and I headed up to Three Lakes to see their fireworks and hear the band 4th Floor. We had the chance to hang out a little with Alissa and Josh too. I just wish we had more time to chat. I know if he wasn't so nervous, they would have really loved him.

While we were there, the 'kids' found the play ground very interesting.



After the fireworks, we came home for some late night Taco Bell and all basically passed out watching TV.

When I woke up this morning, I can't explain how nice it felt knowing that there were other people in the house. Living alone hasn't really been so great so far. It was nice to not feel so alone for a little bit.

Find Your Independence...

Monday Moumblings...

Here it is Monday morning. And oh dear lord, today will not go smooth. Allow me to elaborate.

1. It's Monday. Mondays are always hectic. A billion night drop transactions from the weekend, the mad scramble to correct the over spending of the weekend, ATM machines need to be balanced. The vault needs to change hands.

2. It's is the 3rd of the month. Fucking social security day. Enough said.

3. It's the day before a federal holiday. People haven't yet discovered the miracle of ATM cards. When they know the bank is closed, they FREAK OUT! It's a mad rush because, OMG THEY CAN'T GO TO THE BANK.

4. The local merchants will be out in full force. They need change for the busy holiday.

5. All of my supervisors and personal bankers are gone. How is it that they can all be gone at one time and 2 tellers can't be gone at the same time?

6. As of Friday night, the vault was not in balance. As of Saturday, Kiki is not in balance.

7. I am nowhere near ready for the parade tomorrow. Posters are not made, other things are not done and I might not have time to get to them when I am on the clock.

I know it's going to be a busy day, I know alot is going to be expected of me. I know Kiki and Laurie are going to need me there for them today. So, as much as I am dreading today, I am ready for whatever comes along today. The day should go fast and for that I am thankful.

And I would like to throw together a cookout for...TOMORROW. But I don't know how that is going to work.

Lather, Rinse, Repeat...

Stumbling and squinting, the three friends emerged from the bar into dawn's early light.

They say a hangover is just dehyrdation. Pass me the Gatorade, please.

Wasted...

For the 1st time ever...I don't have my car. My purse is in my car. Josh drove me home. No clue when I am getting my car back, but I just sat up and drank (in a bar) with him and Kiki until 5 am.

So worth it.

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes...

You should watch for some.

Close Your Eyes, Give Me Your Hand...

Ok, so it's not an eternal flame. But a question.

It's after 4 in the morning. Stay up and watch the sunrise? Sleep?

What to do?