Sunday, July 31, 2005

Back To The Real World...

I have returned relatively unharmed (damn toes).

I didn't die in a horrific car crash. But we knew that. I am suddenly one of those cars the I make fun of. "You should really get that looked at." Yeah, yeah. Going Tuesday.

So here's the run down:

Trips to the hospital: 1 (someone tore his ACL playing volley ball....us Wisconsin kids are just to tough for the MN crowd. Listen to me....like I was playing volley ball...lol, but I did watch).

Injured toes: 3 (I got 'road rash' in between my toes. Don't ask, because I couldn't tell you how it happened.)

Times I got drunk in 2 days: 3

I don't feel like doing that anymore....So I won't

I had no idea that MrsGiggles neighbor, Wyoming was sooo pretty up close. I think I love him.

I developed crush over the weekend...but I am just silly girl and it might have been the booze speaking to me.

MrsGiggles party was a huge success. Everyone had a great time. Let's hope we can do it again next year.

I am going to call for an estimate on the windshield in the morning and see if my insurance will cover any of it. And Squeakers is going in on Tuesday to see if my car Dr. can work his magic.

Off to bed.

Saturday, July 30, 2005

That's Just A Kick In The Ass...

Well, Picture this. Flying down 494 yesterday and all of a sudden.

"TINK"

That's right a freaking rock. Made two nice little holes in my windshield.

Just as I was getting over this...

"SQUEAK SQUEAK SQUEAK" everytime I let my foot off the brake. It looks like I have brake problems now too.

When I asked if I could make it home like this...

"Probably." Probably???

I am so annoyed with all this.

Thursday, July 28, 2005

The Unbearable Likeness of Beans...

Well, now that we got that out of our system this post hasn't a thing to do with beans or their unbearable likeness of, well anything. But please note, that I also harbor no discrimintory feelings towards the bean species in general. However, I do not like those of the refried inclination.

What was I talking about? Oh yes, beans and how this post is nothing about beans.

Yesterday MM and I went shopping for her wedding dress. She looked beautiful. But then I don't think I have ever seen an ugly bride. I can't wait to see what she picks.

We went to my favorite store on earth and I bought this. I have been lusting after it for months. I finally broke down and bought it. My joy was great. Until it broke. I am returning it this weekend.

Which brings me to my next point, barring any major event this evening. I will not be blogging until Monday (or maybe Sunday night, who knows). MrsGiggles is having a little shindig this weekend...and I heard that there might be alcohol involved. So I am sure that there will be some interesting snippets to share upon my return to the real world.

And there's never been a better weekend to go away. I am sitting here listening to the news and the lead story being that you can't drink the city water. There is some bacteria that breeds bacteria (so even spineless life forms are getting more action then Mark) in the water. It won't be ok to drink until Monday sometime. I along with every other person in town will run out and buy some bottled water. Can you imagine having to boil the water to brush your teeth? Their solution to the water crisis. Flush the water with chlorine, which we all know kills every living thing. Including me. I have a chlorine allergy. This should be fun.

Assuming, I am still alive (listen to my drama) I will talk to you alls after the weekend.

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Those That Give...

...Can Take Away

I am pulling a Kiki and posting this on both blogs.

Shortly after I announced for the entire office to hear that I was bored with my current duties and needed a challenege, I semed to have that wish granted. I have been so excited that I was learning to back-up Saltine in some of her duties. It was challenging and I was really enjoying learning. Today, Wheat Thin walked in and saw what I was doing and flipped.

"Under no conditions, is she to be doing that."

When asked why, the only reason I was given was, "So and So said so."

What the hell kind of answer is that? I am good enough to do part of her job but not all of it?

I think it's time for a little sit down.

Sunday, July 24, 2005

Not Quite Hard Copy...

OK, well, Lab Boy was ever so eager to throw some questions my way. This was harder then I expected. But, I thought who better to ask the questions then a stranger. I always think in situations like this, if you know the person very well, the questions are structured to get a certain type of answer. In this case, he doesn’t know what to expect so the questions are more of a fact finding mission then anything else. If you want to play leave me a comment asking for an interview.


1) Why are you attracted to the men that you are attracted to? Physical, mental attributes?

I seem to only be attracted to those that will treat me badly lately. So they must be unattainable dicks apparently.

Attraction is a funny thing. Everyone knows the prom king standing around a circle of his football buddies cracking bad jokes and attracting a gaggle of equally fake women. These are your plastics. Your Ken Dolls of the world. They are damn good to look at but will never be good for you.

Sometimes the most attractive thing is the average looking guy carrying on a conversation with a few people and obviously enjoying himself. He doesn’t look around for someone better to spend his time with, he is there in the moment with the person/people in front of him. When he laughs, he really laughs from his soul. You can see it in his eyes. He is real.

It’s fun to play with your dolls, but like any toy, it’s going to get old fast.


2) You have the cash and time to travel anywhere in the world, where and why?

There are so many things to experience in life. I don’t just want to see one thing, I want to see it all. I don't want to miss out on anything. And if you have all this time and money, why not?

My 1st stop would have to be either London, or New York.

3) You are about to start a new life in a new place, and you can only stay in touch with one friend. Who is that friend?

I can’t pick just one. I have to have two. And if I can’t have two, I am not going.

MrsGiggles and Digi. I can’t imagine my life without them. I need them both for very different reasons but the need exsists none the leess.

4) You get ten million dollars if you yourself cut off one of your fingers. Would you do it? And which finger would it be?

I live in Wisconsin. Over time almost everyone loses all/part of a finger. So, yes. Money isn’t everything, but is sure helps.

My right pinky finger. When have I ever used it?

5) Tell us about the most embarrasing moment you've had. Ever.

Memories of my life are flooding over me like a tidal wave. I can’t seem to pick what is worse. Public humiliation is always worse then private. So, we will pick one there. I don’t think it’s the worst moment of my life. But it’s up there.

I was probably a freshman in high school, maybe 8th grade I don’t know. My little family and I were walking out to the car after Sunday service and it was an especially busy Sunday and also quite windy this day as well. As I was desending the church stair a gentle breeze unknowingly had flipped my skirt up. (How I couldn’t feel this? I will never understand.) So here I am standing outside my church, smiling nicely while my parents make small talk, skirt flipped up to my waist. I have no idea how long I stood there before someone sad something in passing loud enough for me to hear. I hear, “Yes honey, that’s that girl’s underwear.” I don’t think much of it until a few moments later, my Pastor comes up and whispers in my ear.

I slid my skirt back down and excused myself to the car to cry.

To this day I have no idea how long I was standing on a busy downtown street, with my ass shown to the world.

Here’s How It Works

Please post your answers on your blog. If other bloggers want to be interviewed, you must interview them if they ask you by:
1. Leaving you a comment saying 'interview me please'
2. You will respond by asking you five questions here on their blog (not the same questions you see here)
3. They will update their blog/site with the answers to the questions4
. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Saturday, July 23, 2005

Life's Little Milestones...

This one hit me hard.

Today I got my 1st Social Security statement.

Friday Feast (On Saturday)...

Appetizer
What kind of car do you drive? If you could make an even trade for any other car, what would you want to drive?

Dessa Dynasty is a 92 Dodge. I love her and hate her all at the same time. Maybe it's committment issues, I don't know. I would trade her in for one of three, a Pontiac G6, a Mazda 6, or a Stratus Coupe.

Soup
Take your phone number and add each number together separately (example:
8+6+7+5+3+0+9=38) - what's the total?

23

Salad
When were you last outside, and what were you doing?

Sprinting from my car to work, trying to avoid the rain and tardiness.

Main Course
What is your favorite restaurant, and what do you usually order there?

Applebee's and Fiesta Lime Chicken

Dessert
Name 3 things in which you occasionally indulge.

1. Purses
2. Beer
3. Visits to MrsGiggles

Friday, July 22, 2005

Bring On The Lovin'...

Kiki is broken today. I think we should should shower her with blogging love!!!

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

Ok, so about every 6 months Warner Bros' has been able to fill the void that the ending of Friends has left people (me) with by releasing a new season on DVD. I am sitting at season 9 and holding. Twilding my thumbs.

Well, today my joy has been given a date. November 15! And a video game too!!! I might have to get a gaming system!!

The Best Smurfing Thing Ever...

A Smurf's movie?

Zoinks! You can't tell, but I am excited!

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

What A Ruiner...

So I was talking to Saltine at work about the movie "Remember the Titans" that she loaned me.

The conversation went something like this (sorry if I spoil anything):

I say, "It's so sad at the end when he dies."

"I know, isn't it tragic?" replies Saltine

"You mean about ______?" Chicken in a Biscuit comments.

SHE TOTALLY RUINED HARRY POTTER FOR ME!!!!! I KNOW WHO KICKS IT AND AM PISSED!!!!

Timewaster Of Choice...

Cosmo has this bedroom blog. Funny, Fluffy, Fictional. I have been engrossed enough by it to not read anything else.

Certainly a chick read...but funny.

Monday, July 18, 2005

My Heart Flitters With Joy...

Does this mean Jude Law is single? He should call me, I think I might be ok with a little fling on the side from time to time.

I am scared for little Frankie. He's 19. His new fiance looks 39. Why are all these young things getting married? (My shock and disgust is a cover for my obvious jealousy.)

I Hate That Feeling...

You know the one. Sitting around waiting for the phone to ring. As the wait continues, that feeling of rejection grows with every passing second. You know, that pit in your stomach that eventually becomes a rock. Weighing you down, pulling you under. Making you re-think your approach to everything.

And then the phone rings.

And that feeling is great.

Sunday, July 17, 2005

Strange, Slippery Goodness...

So I was sitting on my couch laying in front of the fan, because it's hotter then holy hell outside, enjoying my favorite frozen treat. The Bomb Pop. It's like 3 tasty snacks in one. Yummy. But this is not my point. I was just glancing at the wrapper and saw this. A warning on my popsicle.

"Notice: This product when extermely cold, may stick to warm lips or tongue. Allow to warm slightly before eating."

So then, let's break this down.

"Extermely cold" meaning ... frozen.

"Allow to warm" meaning ... melt.

If I understand this right, this popsicle that I got out of my freezer is frozen. And I should let it melt before I eat it.

If this is the case, why put it on a stick? If it's only going to melt into a syrup-y puddle, why not give me a straw instead of the stick?

Weekend Recap...

Friday Night: Helped MM with her laundry, met a friend from out of town. Might be seeing him again the next few days. Did the Harry Potter thing. Watched 21 Grams. Good but hard to follow. I had to watch it twice. Called it a night when I took MM home at 4:30 Saturday morning.

Saturday: AJ's 50th Birthday party. The woman throws one hell of a party. Althou, it was held on the sun! It's been overwhelmingly hot lately. And this was no exception. I have never heard of an unair conditioned golf course club house. MrGiggles tried really hard to get Annie wasted. He did an ok job, but didn't get the job done. However, he and the lovely MrsGiggles were feeling no pain.

Sunday: It's too soon to tell if anything good is going to happen. It's not even 3 in the afternoon yet.

Friday, July 15, 2005

The End Is Here...

Well, the votes have been counted and after a grueling discussion it was narrowed down to the following 3 entires as a 3-way tie.

"Inheriting two hundred million dollars doesn't mean much when you have a weak heart."

"Take this pill. I swear you will not wake up in the nude. "

"Hi, will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into this cheap motel room across the street."

After bringing in a surprise judge, Saltine, the winner is MPH with "Take This Pill. I swear you will not wake up in the nude."

The winner gets to write a post on this page about my 'Mexican Toe Disease'. Or anyother darn thing he wants.

Thursday, July 14, 2005

Last Chance...

Submit your last minute entries in the Cheesy Pick-up Line Contest.

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

What A Strange Coincidence...

Brad and Jennifer both mysteriously ill at the same time.

I think they are trying to throw us off the trail of their reconciliation.

Sunday, July 10, 2005

Concern Is Setting In...

A street a few blocks from my house was blocked off police baracades. No one seems to know why the 8 squads were there.

I am getting the impression that I don't live in a great neighborhood.

Saturday, July 09, 2005

Headlines...

On more then one occassion I have refered to Us Weekly as the paper. Think of this as your weekly Cliff's Notes.

Cover - Brad and Angelina are Adopting. What it actually said is. Angie is adpoting a little girl and Brad happend to be at the paper signing.

Pauly Shore has a new sitcom airing on TBS Sunday nights at 10/9c, Minding The Store. Not to take the movie title (that I didn't watch) too literally, but isn't Pauly Shore dead?

Bennifer 2.0 got hitched in a secert beach ceremony at a resort owned by ... Bruce Willis (???). The only two guest were Alias co-star Victor Garber and a friend of his. Where was Matt?

The movie boys of summer include: James Franco (The Great Raid), Cillian Murphy (Batman Begins and Red Eye), Chris Evans (duh...Fantastic 4), Bradley Cooper (Wedding Crashers), and Garrett Hedlund (Four Brothers). Ahhh....summer....

Katie Holmes now wishes to be called Kate. Because she's a big girl now.

Peaasant skirts...GOOD!

Well, There you have it. And not one mention of Jessica Simpson, Bam, or Jennifer Aniston (but she's in there....but who really believes that her and Vince Vaughn are together. But then again I said that about Katie Holmes...)

Movie Mumblings...

I have watched alot. So here's the more noteables.

Saw: Creepy, but not so good. I had the heebie jeebies for days.

Mystic River: Well, I dug it a whole lot!!!! I just adored it. It deserved every award it was nominated for.

Fantastic 4: It's title lies. Not Fantastic. Man, was I pumped for this movie. What a let down. It seemed like it was a long trailer for the film. Not big on the action. However, what I did really like was Chris Evans naked wrapped up in a pink ski jacket. NUMMY! The sequel has potential to be very cool.

Saw a sign hanging in the lobby for Corpse Bride. My excitement grows with each passing day. I am also hoping to take in War Of The Worlds (because everybody else is doing it) and Charlie and The Chocolate Factory. YAY Charlie!!!

Bring Me Your Cheesiest...

It's high time I had my own contest. Ala Digi-style. Present me with you best (worst) pick-up lines. Guest judges will be Kiki and MrsGiggles. We will accept submissions until Thursdaywith the winner announcement being on Monday.

The winner gets to write a post (and have it appear) on this page about my 'Mexican Toe Disease'. The rules to the post. It must be in story format. It must be less than 10000 words (Digi). It must include an animal and a taco. Bonus points given for use of refried beans.

Friday, July 08, 2005

Thursday, July 07, 2005

Respectful Silence...

In light of today's new events, it just doesn't seem appropriate to be glib (I love that word).

It's strange that it happened the day after the Olympics announcement. I am trying to decide if that or the G8 summit has more bearing on today's events.

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Attack Of The Rednecks...

Every July, my sleepy little town becomes a booming city. It's alive with the on-set of country fans. See, Nowhere is host to one of the biggest country music festivals in the country. I used to go quite alot, and take my contempt in this post as hidden jealousy because I can't go and I really really want to.

All the locals know that you must avoid major gathering places during waking hours. I made this very critical mistake. I went to Wal-Mart yesterday afternoon. OMG!!!!

Dumb girl!

Still jealous

Post Holiday Breakdown...

I trust everyone had a safe, and happy holiday weekend. Or at least a drunk one. I did, but we will get there in time.

Friday night, I had my weekly scrap session with MM. It's quickly becoming the only time I work on my books at all. S and his roommate (at least I think they are roomies) stopped over to check out the new place.

Saturday I worked. Of Course. Mrs Giggles and Crew stopped over. I was 1/2 drunk at the time but it was fun to see everyone anyway. After they left NN1 (see Neighbor post) had the nerve to tell me that if we had planned on having a party we had better have it on a Sunday or Monday. Because after all NN2 would not like it if when he came home, there were cars in the driveway.

OH, IT'S ON NOW!

The cookout is at the end of next month. You are all invited come early, stay days...but it's strictly B.Y.O.B., I'm a girl on a budget.


Anyways, watched the fireworks on the lake, that was cool. We would have gone to the park, but we had to avoid Annie's arch nemisis, Candy Cane, so we went boating. There was more drinking involved there. Got home and S and his video store buddy were waiting at the house for us. More drinking occured when we headed to a local bar. Two things to mention about that bar, MOONSHINE BAD!!!! And I saw a local investment banker (heard he was a freak...in a good way...have to hots for him), in a bikini contest. During which he showed his junk to the whole bar. I was disappointed. Made some drunken phone calls and went home to pass out.

Monday went to the dumb parade...And went to Annie's parents. They had some very not legal fireworks but it was super fun.

All in all, good weekend.

Saturday, July 02, 2005

Stay Tuned....

For Tales From The Vault: Confessions of a Teller.

A joint effort from Kiki and myself.

Friday, July 01, 2005

I Am More Of A Domestic Brew Kind Of Girl...

So I am reading this article 10 Things Every Single Girl Should Own. I understand 8 & 10, but what about the others?

I would be interested to hear a little male feedback on this topic. So both of you, what do you think?

Insert Suspenseful Music Here...

Can You Boss Fire You for Blogging?

And I just discovered that Mr and MrsGiggles + 3 will be stopping by my house tomorrow. It's trashed. MM and I are supposed to get together and scrap tonight. I think that's ok, after a massive house cleaning.

Although, I am scared for the dust bunnies. Where will they live now?