A or B...

I am pissed off and frustrated with more then a few things (people) right now.

I am sitting here trying to debate whether it's worth hashing out and talking about it...or, just saying fuck it and admit that life sucks sometimes.

I chose option B.

Some Of The Boys...

I don't know why I like this picture. It's at a bad angle. You can't see Benny's face. I have no reason to like this.

But I do.

Life Available In 25 Cent Increments...

Lack of funds is causing Kiki and myself to sell off our personal belongings, yard sale style.

So pieces of my life are available in 25 cent increments.

If there is anything of mine you want, speak up fast.

I Am That Kind Of Dork...

Nsync's 'Bye Bye Bye' is on the radio.

Kiki and I both got very excited.

That's How Drunk...

Thursday night, post softball.

The boys were all sitting at the bar mystified by "The World Series of DARTS"! Fucking darts! I was so entertained by this that I posed the question to Josh.

"How drunk/stoned do you have to be to find darts interesting?" (cuz that's how some of those boys are).

Well, the answer is...4 Smirnoff on the rocks for Juicy to find it completely captivating.

How much did those 4 drinks cost me? $5! God, I love the NWL!

Nap Time...

Tonight, I am babysitting Ray-ray's kids while her and her husband go see Smashmouth.

I haven't babysat in years. I am actually looking forward to it.

Her kids go to bed by like 8. I am soooo taking advantage and catching up on my sleep that I lost the last two nights.

Funny Story...

I was asked on Wednesday night by one of the softball boys if I was coming to the game the following night.

Before I had a chance to answer, one of the other guys replied.

"Shut up, she's our only fan that isn't Josh's mom or doesn't want to do Josh. Don't scare her away."

I was entertained.

Weird...

I have referred to myself as a pretty girl several times this week and meant it.

That's never happened before.

We Are Experiencing Technical Stuff...

Cellphone being sent in for repair today.

I love my phone! I am going to miss it.

But fear not, I have been sent a loaner phone. *grumbles* damn Nokia. I am not exactly sure how the transistion process is going to work, but if you can't get ahold of me....leave a message. I'll find ya!

*smooches*

Rock The Fuck On...

Dead Like Me is on Sci-Fi channel as reruns!

Leave The Pieces...

A boy fucked with my head today. My heart too. I seldom let stuff of this nature get me down...because well, look at me. I am freaking adorable.


Ok, not really. But why worry about something you can't control.

Well, this boy raked me over the coals this morning. By the time I was at work, I was questioning everything about myself.

Josh pointed out, when I had lunch at his other place of employment (not the bar), that perhaps I shouldn't be letting anyone make me feel that bad.

And then he and Will offered to kick his ass. This skinny assed white boys made me smile and all is right in Juiceland tonight. (If I was a theme park, I imagine that would be the name)

But I can't help but think of "Leave the Pieces" by The Wreckers (Michelle Branch's pet project).

"You're gonna break my heart anyway, so leave the pieces when you go..."

Even if you don't like country sounding stuff...it's quite good and deserves a listen.

Bored...

You May Be a Bit Dependent...

You're more than a little preoccupied with being abandoned. You need a lot of support in your life, at all times. It's difficult for you to survive on your own... And you don't reallly think you ever could.

What Personality Disorder Are You?

You Are 36% Lady

You tend to make up your rules of etiquette, throwing all conventions aside. And while you try to be a lady (sometimes), your behavior is often quite shocking.

Are You A Lady?

Slow and Steady

Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It'd really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment. They expect you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then usually decide against it.

How Do People See You?

You're Totally Sarcastic

You sarcastic? Never! You're as sweet as a baby bunny. Seriously, though, you have a sharp tongue - and you aren't afraid to use it. And if people are too wimpy to deal with your attitutde, then too bad. So sad.

How Sarcastic Are You?

Caffe Vanilla Frappuccino

Smooth and sweet, you fit in to almost any crowd. No one would suspect you of being a coffee tweaker!

What Flavor Frappuccino Are You?

Orange County

You're rich, pretty, and living a charmed life. (Or you seriously wish you were.) From Disneyland to Laguna Beach, you're all about living the California dream life. Just make sure to marry rich - so you don't have to work for it!

Where Does Your Inner Californian Belong?

You Are A Martini

You are the kind of drinker who appreciates a nice hard drink. And for you, only quality alcohol. You don't waste your time on the cheap stuff. Obviously, you're usually found with a martini in your hand. But sometimes you mix it up with a gin and tonic. And you'd never, ever consider one of those flavored martinis. They're hardly a drink!

What Alcoholic Drink Are You?

You Aren't Scary, You're Scared

Probably even scared to see how this quiz came out!

How Scary Are You?

You Are a Learning Cook

You've got the makings of an excellent cook, and the desire to be one. But right now, you're just lacking the experience. You couldn't be a top chef yet, but you could be an apprentice.

Are You A Good Cook?

This And That...

I finally have a day off! I have been working alot of weekends (all of them) without getting my day off because we have been kinda short handed. Everybody else gets their days off, except for me.

Today is my turn.

I was suppose to get up and go to the Y with Ray-ray. Yea, no. I needed a nap. I have been sick and I wanted to sleep. So that's what I did.

Melbell and I just drug our asses out of bed now, she's caught my cold I think. I feel bad. Summer colds are the worst and this one sucks.

I need to go to bitch out my cellphone provider today. I have a flip phone. It is set so that when you open the display it answers the incoming call. Well, the sensor is on the fritz and tends to hang up most of my calls right now. The screen will flash on and then decide it's not really feeling like acknowledging that I have opened the phone.

Piece o shit is what it is.

I need to do laundry as well. I normally do that on Sunday, but as I didn't care about anything other then sleeping off my Saturday night, this Sunday, it seemed to be perfect that I had today off.

I am going to lunch with Joshie and one of his friends. I have eaten more chinese then ever since I started hanging out with Josh.

I should probably clear up some Josh things too. Josh is one of my closest friends right now. Guys are just soo much easier to hang out with sometimes. As wonderful as he is, I don't think Josh and I would be a good relationship fit. When I say things like "date night", I don't really mean date night. We are just good friends. I would NEVER do anything that come between Kiki and Josh either. I think they are going to make a cute couple, if it comes to that.

Poor Melbelle, is fast asleep on the couch. Even when she's not feeling well, she's beautiful. I just wish she was less troubled.

Nothing To Say...

I’m tugging at my hair
I’m pulling at my clothes
I’m trying to keep my cool
I know it shows
I’m staring at my feet
My cheeks are turning red
I’m searching for the words inside my head

(Cause) I’m feeling nervous
Trying to be so perfect
Cause I know you’re worth it
You’re worth it
Yeah

If I could say what I want to say
I'd say I wanna blow you... away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down
On one knee
Marry me today
Guess, I’m wishing my life away
With these things I’ll never say

It don’t do me any good
It’s just a waste of time
What use is it to you
What’s on my mind
If it ain’t coming out
We’re not going anywhere
So why can’t I just tell you that I care

What’s wrong with my tongue
These words keep slipping away
I stutter, I stumble
Like I’ve got nothing to say

Guess I’m wishing my life away with these things I’ll never say
If I could say what I want to say
I'd say I wanna blow you...away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down
On one knee
Marry me today
Yes, I’m wishing my life away
With these things I’ll never say
These things I’ll never say

Starry Eyed Surprise...

I woke up in the middle of the night to get a drink and got a bloody nose. This in itself is not foreign to me. Happens all the time.

Well, I have gotten 4 more since then. This last one is proving really hard to stop. I have been bleeding steadily since 6. It's after 7 now. I just can't get it to clot. I have tried ice pack, tipping my head, the whole 9 yards.

It started in the shower thankfully, because I sneezed and my nose exploded. I am sore. And it wouldn't be so bad except, it's bleeding so hard that I have actually stopped noticing the metallic taste of blood in my mouth. I keep having to stop to hack blood because, apparently it can't seem to get out of my nose fast enough.

I know that if it doesn't stop soon, I am going to have to go to the walk-in. Yay. Just what I wanted to do this morning.

An Ode To My Apartment...

I am going to randomly post things that annoy me about my apartment.

Today's issue. Water.

You can't drink the water here. You can't really cook with the water here. It's REALLY BAD well water. It turns my sinks, tubs, toliet a lovely shade of rust. It's a constant job making sure that this stuff clean. It stinks most days too.

Tonight I ran a bucket of water, to mop the floors. The water in the bucket was brown before the mop even hit the bucket.

It's gross.

Destination Unknown...

Last night did not go as planned.

Josh and I did make it out to dinner. With Melanie. It was revealed at dinner that we had some stuff to discuss, but he didn't want to talk about it with me until he had a few drinks in him. I am not going to lie. It didn't sound good. I got nervous. We are all sitting there and Melanie let it out that she didn't have alot of cash and needed help covering dinner. Nice.

We didn't make the movie, because dinner at one of the best establishments in town took FOREVER! I really wanted to go see Clerks last night. Oh well. Another day, I imagine.

Well, since we didn't get to the movie, we made plans to meet in a little bit at our favorite bar and see where the night takes us.

Melanie wanted to quick stop at a friend's house party, which was ok by me. Until we got there and the reason we were actually there became clear. Her ex was there. After leaving the party and going to meet with Josh, I knew way ahead of time, that she was going to ditch me. We had driven together and I had no car, but I knew she was going to ditch me.

Right on cue, after her 1st drink, she announced she was leaving. Josh sensing my instant annoyance, drove me back home to get my car.

I love Mel to death, but she is a dramatic little girl. She puts herself in stupid places because she is scared of being single. I was almost relieved that she left, I wasn't going to have to hash over all night, what him looking at her might have meant, etc. I didn't have to babysit. So that was alright. I was free to enjoy myself.

Josh and I headed to another one of our favorite drinking establishments and spend the rest of the evening there. I spent the majority of my time chatting with my favorite Young politican. The man is a bastard, he is ruthless, he is smooth, and cunning. And he is a hell of a lot of fun. Josh and I just kept tabs on each other and entertained ourselves by texting some what catty comments back and forth across the bar.

Well, when the aspiring president was in the bathroom, I heard a voice behind me ask if we could talk. I knew the voice to be familiar but I wasn't expecting the person who was standing there.

Kiki's ex-boyfriend.

So here I was, being pulled aside in a busy bar, by a friend's ex and his friends. Nothing like being put on the spot. Thankfully, the boy was drunk and I didn't have to deal with him a long time. He asked a lot of questions that I could not answer and not because I didn't know the answer. I didn't want to meddle. He asked who Josh was. I was vague and the only answer I gave him was, "Josh is a good friend of mine." This seemed ok. He continued pouring his heart out to me and I sincerely felt bad for the guy. He has feelings for Kiki. It's gotta hurt going through what he is. But since I don't date, I wouldn't know.

Then Mel showed up. He cornered Mel and pulled her aside, leaving me with one of his friends. A very drunk friend. Who took the last $7 I had sitting on the table and then asked if he could buy me a drink. Smooth. Josh sensing I was in some distress came over at the perfect time and wrapped himself around me. Mel and the ex returned and damn near insisted that I head to the bar where ever one ends up to drink and oogle the opposite sex. I promised I would try to make it, knowing that I wasn't hanging out with them, under free will.

Well, the night went on and Josh's wingman appeared and the drinks started to flow pretty fast. I didn't actually pay for them anymore, which is spectacular. Knowing the bartenders in this town, has gotten me far.

Next thing, I knew. I was in the passenger seat of my car, and we were headed back to my house. When I say we, I mean, Wingman, Tomtom, Josh and some guy I knew...but didn't know. It was fun none the less. The night started to get a little fuzzy at this point. I am not even really sure how we voted to come to my place. Well, it probably has to do with the fact that Josh hates his house (that he is moving out of today) and my place is cleaner. Kiki showed up at this point, and we all sat around...doing our thing.

For whatever reason, Josh and I were outside and he decided to check his blood sugar (type 1 diabetic). It was dangerously low. He technically should not have been standing even really. After debating the situation rather quickly, it was voted that we were the most aware of our state of beings that we would have to be the ones who took him to get some sugar. So we hopped in the car, no explanations, just went. We felt bad but it was kind of an emergency. It wasn't until after we got to the gas station and was pumping Josh full of orange juice that we noticed that neither of us had any shoes on. Thankfully, we knew the attendant and he didn't seem to care either way.

After the small emergancy had been resolved our morning continued. At about 6, people started to get alittle tired. Wingman and Tomtom headed out in search of the elusive egg mcmuffin and Josh began to get a little concerned about working in a few hours. We sent him in the bedroom to nap, while Kiki and caught each other up on our nights.

Once Josh was snoozing away, Kiki departed and I curled up next to Josh. I set my alarm for him but neither of us really slept. We just kinda of drifted in and out of states of awareness. Being a guy is easy as hell as far as getting ready for work. He was able to wait to leave for work until 9 minutes before his shift started. It was kinda funny. Quick peck on the cheek and he was gone, but not before he whispered that he owed me a talk. I was shocked he remembered and owned up to it.

So yea, that's not exactly the dinner and a movie I had planned.

Today, I am helping Josh move. It's not exactly what I want to be doing. You see, part of 'the talk' that Josh and I are going to have is probably going to cover him moving. And not moving in with me as discussed. I know he feels bad about kinda leaving me hanging, so I know that's what he wants to talk about. Well, that and we need to talk about a trip we had planned to take together that I am pretty sure he is bitching out on. When I called him on it, he said he was 80% sure that he was going but we would talk about it later.

So now that I don't know how to end this MONSTER blog, I am going to get in the shower.

Kisses!

Movie Mumblings...

Wow, I haven't done this in awhile.

Dark Water - Wow. Major blowage. I disliked this very much so.

Undiscovered - I didn't completely hate this. It's movie about a bunch of unknowns trying to break out and find love. Only 'name' in the movie that was anything was Ashlee Simpson. So a bunch of unknowns. They played the roles well, if wasn't a great movie...but good for what it was.

Imagine Me and You - Most unexpected romantic comedy ever. Girl meets boy. Boy proposes. Girl says yes. Girl locks eyes with girl while walking down the aisle?! Girl meets girl. Boy finds out, leaves girl. Girl gets girl? Strange. But entertaining.

Into The Blue - Not half bad for a Jessica Alba movie. Am I the only person who doesn't find her attractive?

Pirates Of The Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest - LONG! It's almost 3 hours. When you figure that they turned a 10 minute amusement park ride into 3 full length films that rock, credit is due somewhere.

Tonight, I go see Clerks 2 with Josh. We are going to try that date night thing again.

Stupid Town...

So Josh and I didn't get our 'date' night last night.

Wingman happens to be the other evening bartender. Well, apparently he just thought, "Maybe I won't go to work today. Being the boss's son, Josh is automatically recruited to fill in these gaps. he was not pleased.

Less pleased was myself. I had a crap day at work, and to be honest was really looking forward to being spoiled a little. How selfish is that? And I don't care, sometimes we all need to be a little selfish.

Now, how is this all the town's fault you might ask? This town almost encourages the residents near my age to drink themselves into oblivion. Well, everytime Wingman does this, he forgets all his stuff. Cellphone, wallet, everything. If you find his stuff just laying about and him not around, yea...you probably won't see him for a few days.

So town's fault date night got cancelled. And now next Friday night I have to babysit for a friend. POO!

Quote Of The Night...

"She's so beautiful, she makes me wish I was single."

You can imagine, that they weren't talking about me. Because they weren't.